Wednesday, October 17, 2012

I2LH-25...The Latest Threat Against American Youth

You've all heard of H1N1, but have you heard of I2LH-25?  Probably not.  Why?  Because I invented it.  It is the name I give to the syndrome suffered by so many younger Americans.  I have seen such a high number inflicted with this in the past week that I felt it necessary to raise awareness.

What exactly is I2LH-25?  Simply put, it is the Inability to Lift your Head.  It happens to many Americans under the age of 25 (hence the 25).  Symptoms include subject being unable to look you in the eye, as well as the inability to acknowledge your presence, even if they are being paid to do so (say at the grocery store, department store, doctors office, etc.).  It is believed that this syndrome stems from cell phone use.  Today's youth have no need to look up to make a point, they have no need to even open their mouths.  Everything is communicated via cell phone.  This syndrome can also branch out leaving the subject unable to spell correctly.

The prognosis isn't pretty.  Studies show that by the age of 40, people suffering from I2LH-25 will look like the Hunchback of Notre Dame.

What can you do?  Educate your children and loved ones.  When you are speaking, require them to look at you and acknowledge your presence.  Ask for their feedback.  When they are speaking to you, have them practice eye contact.  Try communicating in person when you are in the same house, not via text messaging.

Please, help stop I2LH-25 before it becomes an epidemic. As G.I. Joe says, "Now you know, and knowing is half the battle."

This has been a public service announcement from At Donna's Discretion and concerned parents nationwide.

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